When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day are not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar and the two pints of beer.

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly, he picked u
p a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls.

He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly, and the pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed again that it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up the rest of the space. He asked once more if the jar was full, and his students responded with a unanimous “yes.”

The professor then produced two pint glasses of beer from under the table and poured the contents of both into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the grains of sand. The students laughed.

“Now,” said the professor, as the laughter subsided, “I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things – your family, children, health, friends and your favourite passions; things that, if everything else was lost and only they remained, would still make your life full.”

The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house and your car. The sand is everything else – the small stuff.

“If you put the sand into the jar first,” he continued, “There is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you.”

“Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children, take time to get medical checkups, take your partner out to dinner and play another 18 holes. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the leaky tap. Take care of the golf balls first – the things that really matter. Set your priorities, because the rest is just sand.”

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the beer represented.

The professor smiled. “I’m glad you asked. It goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem to be, that there’s always room for a couple of beers with a friend.”

I find this reality: “Research done by Herminia Ibarra at Insead business school found that men are more likely to be friends with more senior male executives by virtue of the fact that they are both male.  By contrast, women tend to be closer to women and friends outside work.” The conclusion, “you can communicate differently with someone you have friendship ties with.”

Maybe I have high ethics, but I have a hard time with this subtitle: “If you are not paid for it, don’t do it.”

This was interesting to me: “People who play  video games start coding because they want to write things for their video games.  Sandberg suggests that one of the steps we could take to get more women into computer science is to make more women-centric video games, and encourage little girls to play them.”

I had to remember what it takes to succeed in a large corporation. I was going to summarize this book, but there were already many in existence.

Here are a few summaries I like:

http://www.scribd.com/mobile/doc/3152662

http://www.westegg.com/unmaintained/carnegie/win-friends.html

“From Maria Rainier:

1. Situate yourself in a quiet, calm, and comfortable place, much like you would for yoga or meditation.

2. Relax. Make a conscious effort to feel individual parts leading to each other with relaxation—from your toes to your feet, your feet to your legs, your hips to your belly, etc. Focus on your breathing when your body has relaxed. You may have to make conscious
efforts to stay relaxed at first, but practice makes perfect.

3. To begin the visualization process, decide what goal you wish to achieve. A better occupation? Healthier lifestyle? Start smaller than these vague, grand goals into ones you can quantify. Work your way up to broader goals as you become more adept with creative
visualization and can acknowledge that it has positively affected your life.

4. Once you have a grasp on the goal you wish to achieve, picture it. Picture the object or yourself in the desirable situation as if you already had it. Do not scorn or belittle this image—treat it as a reality. Concentrate on details of this picture and try to
feel it with individual parts of your body, especially if this is a physical goal. The key here is to really feel the experience as though it were really happening right now, not sometime later in the future, but now.
5. Release yourself from this meditative state and go on about your day. Think of the image you conjured frequently, though. Visualize it over your morning cup of coffee or tea, during your lunch break, while lying awake in bed. Surround this image with positive
energy.

Like meditation or any other therapy or activity, creative visualization takes practice, dedication, earnestness, and time. Treat creative visualization as a tool on your lifelong journey, not as a pill you pop whenever you need an
energy boost.”

Here are some exercises I like:

1.)Healing Meditation: RELEASE YOUR FEARS by Lilou Mace http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BZhD88ERB4U&feature=youtube_gdata_player

2.)Finding your inner self and guide: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lGnB3w80b8M&feature=youtube_gdata_player

3.)Body scan meditation:

• Lie on your back, legs uncrossed, arms relaxed at your sides, eyes open or closed. Focus on your breathing , allowing your stomach to rise as you inhale and fall as you exhale.
• Breathe deeply for about two minutes, until you start to feel comfortable and relaxed.
• Turn your focus to the toes of your right foot. Notice any sensations you feel while continuing to also focus on your breathing. Imagine each deep breath flowing to your toes.
• Remain focused on this area for one to two minutes.
• Move your focus to the sole of your right foot. Tune in to any sensations you feel in that part of your body and imagine each breath flowing from the sole of your foot. After one
  or two minutes, move your focus to your right ankle and repeat. Move to your calf, knee, thigh, hip, and then repeat the sequence for your left leg.
• From there, move up the torso, through the lower back and abdomen, the upper back and chest, and the shoulders. Pay close attention to any area of the body that causes you pain or discomfort.
• Move your focus to the fingers on your right hand and then move up to the wrist, forearm, elbow, upper arm, and shoulder. Repeat for your left arm.
• Then move through the neck and throat, and finally all the regions of your face, the back of the head, and the top of the head.
• Pay close attention to your jaw, chin, lips, tongue, nose, cheeks, eyes, forehead, temples and scalp.
• When you reach the very top of your head, let your breath reach out beyond your body and imagine yourself hovering above yourself.
• After completing the body scan, relax for a while in silence and stillness, noting how your body feels. Then open your eyes slowly. Take a moment to stretch, if necessary.

For a guided body scan: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=obYJRmgrqOU&feature=youtube_gdata_player

4.)Wheel of emotion: http://robinnixon.com/thejourney/the-wheel-of-emotion. Start “In particular, when you are experiencing a negative mood and don’t know why, you can use my wheel as a means of working out exactly what’s affecting you, so that you can more clearly focus in on the problem (or problems) and make better-informed decisions about how to deal with your mood.”

What I like most is just letting my mind and body lead me to my personal time of choice in my favorite chair.  If I feel I want to study God’s word, I pick up a devotional book and do so.  If I feel I need to do an above visualization excercise, I do so.  If I feel I need to pick up a famous Jodi Picoult novel, I do so.  Visualization is all about maintaining your personal balance and peace, and often about connecting to the inner voice I like to call God!

• Go to bed early and wake early, and at the same times
• Get eight hours of sleep per day
• Eat 5 or 6 small meals a day
• Take breaks every 90-120 minutes a day
• Eat breakfast
• Do two cardio and two strength exercises a week
• Drink 48-64 oz of water per day
• Have a balanced diet and focus on low glycemic foods (http://www.low-glycemic-foods.org/)

The book also suggests adding rituals that are aligned with your values. For instance, if you want to enrich your relationships, make sure you call someone you care about on the way home from work.

From this book I also liked their statement, “Positive energy flows from opportunity, adventure, and challenge.” Negative energy is precipitated by threat, danger, and fears of survival.”

I strongly agree with the philosophies of this book.  I still wish to learn visualization techniques as well.

Here are my favorite take always: “Great questions mirror the buying cycle of the customer.   The problem with the questioning of the unsuccessful sales rep is that it reflects the sales process rather than the purchasing process. S.P.I.N. stands for “Situation questions,”
“Problem questions,” “Implication questions,” and “Need-payoff questions.” These questions reflect the process a customer goes through when making a purchasing decision. First, they take account of their present situation. Then, they realize that there is a problem is some area. Next, they think about the negative effects the problem could have on their business. Finally, they evaluate the benefits of solutions. Traditional questioning jumps straight to benefits, without even bothering to discover if those “benefits” are relevant to the customer. SPIN selling walks the customer through the purchasing process in a manner with which they are more comfortable…

The successful salespeople highlighted the purpose of the call, gained agreement from the prospect, and simply moved forward.”

I am thankful to my Almighty that he chose for me the profession of Selling. He chose me to
add value to life of people and to alleviate pains of the people. I promise that I will perform my role without compromising on ethics and values.

Where ever I go, I promise, I will carry a message of optimism, a message of positive values. I will shun negative people. I will shun the gossip groups. I will not waste my major time on minor things. I will rededicate myself daily to be the harbinger of hope and the messenger
of positive thinking.

I promise to be proud of the organization I represent. I am proud of the products and services that I offer to solve the problems of the people. Every moment, every hour, every day, I will consciously make effort to increase and update my knowledge about my products, about my organization and about my industry. Knowledge is power and I will increase my knowledge every day. I will multiply my worth and value by reading books and by getting associated
with people of substance.

From now onward, I promise, I will knock at more doors; I will call on more people, to help them benefit from my offerings. In this process, I may get rejected, but I will not take rejections personally. I promise that I will keep my hopes and morale very high even in the wake of disappointments and frustrations.

I will strive to build quality, long term relationships with my customers and to deal fairly
and honestly with all people and companies I encounter. I will continually endeavor to increase the level of service to my customers. I will help my customers discover the best solutions to their sales, marketing, and management needs by listening, providing information, and performing services to the highest standards of excellence. My expertise will position me to serve with the highest quality plans, strategies, advice, and support.

I believe, God provides ‘livelihood’ to me and my family through my customers. I will make
every possible effort to give them value for money. I will go extra mile and extra smile with them to give them delightful experience of my products and services. I promise that from now onward I will plan my sales calls immaculately. I will leave no room for carelessness. I
promise to share my knowledge and experiences with my colleagues without any conditions.

On coaching, I will help others when I am able, without sacrificing my goals. I will respond
to those who ask me for help and enable them to find the answers themselves and develop their own problem solving skills.  I will help them turn their fears into positive goals that they can effect today.  I will challenge them and keep them accountable towards their goals.  I will help those around me recognize their own passions and strengths in order to help them bring out their best and get what they want out of life. I will focus my outreach on the mediocre, not the flying or failing reps, as studies show this is what will help my employer the most. I will continue to lead by example in sales, marketing, and writing and seek leadership positions.

Optimism, hope, helping others, ethics and values, winning, and keep on winning is my identity.

I have reviewed Gitomer’s Social Boom and his Sales Bible and he is not a deep read, so it doesn’t take much of your time to review his main thoughts.  I think you can learn a little from everyone, and I like to note when writers agree.  To me, these are the points you focus on.  For instance, both Gitomer’s and Godin’s main point was to, “stand out or don’t bother.”  I do agree that from Godin, we can learn more, as everyone wants to follow and learn from his blogs.  From Godin we can learn both from his philosophies and his example.

Specific to Gitomer’s Sales Bible, I like the idea of a mission statement.  In this book, Gitomer discussed what customers want from us in general and in questions.  He also shared his own mission statement.  I also found this “Daily Mantra of a Salesperson” years ago, and love it: http://ashrafchaudhryblog.com/daily-mantra-of-a-salesperson/.  I plan to spend a couple hours putting this all together into my own mission statement as guidelines for being the best
Account Manager for Office Depot.

My main thought on reading sales books is to remember to be your own person.  Take what you are comfortable taking and follow those you want to be like the most.  For example, I will never again be a hard closer, so I do not tend to take from books like Selling to Vito that tell you to harass customer’s (hit ‘em with voicemail, email, direct mail, etcetera until they answer).  I tend to take more from Jill Konrad.  She tells you that whenever you do outbound to a customer, respect that they are short on time and make the time they give you of value to them.  A couple years ago, this same philosophy led me to one of my favorite interview
questions.  I now ask potential employers what their favorite books and philosophies are.  I asked them questions around their closing philosophies; if they had told me I would have to offer “end of the month” specials, I would have run far and fast.  I knew Office Depot was a match when they ask about my ethics and said they are creating their quotas around margin. This said to me that they put a huge importance on ethics and wanted us to manage our relationships around higher-end principles versus just cutting costs.